Pregnant and Infant Loss Awareness

October is one of the months that plays with my emotions. There are some days and some times that I just really miss those two boys of mine. October 11, 2012 was the date my Dr. was going to induce me with Quincy. October 15 is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness day and the entire month is set up to remember those who have lost babies and children way too soon. Days and months like this, I hurt for those Mom's that have been through similar situations and wonder how they are holding up. And I always think, "what would Mac and Quincy look like" "what would they be doing now"....

This year my prayers were answered in a round about way with Quincy. I am LDS and so I hold a calling in my ward, Nursery Leader. About midway through the year, the Primary Presidency moved some of the younger Nursery kids up to my class (we have 3 nurseries because there are so many kids ages 18 months to 3 years!). One holds a really special place in my heart because her Mom and I were pregnant at the same time, due the same month. Little Miss Saylor always comes and sits on my lap first thing. She hugs me throughout the class and always seems to know just what I need from a little friend Quincy's age. She'll hold my hand and tell me funny things that makes her nose crinkle. I am lucky to be able to watch her grow up and have a small taste of what Quincy would be doing... There are two other boys that also celebrate their birthdays in October and I watch them every Sunday in wonder! Saylor likes the books and bubbles, Rafe likes cars and ring-around-the-rosie, Noah loves to run and get his hands on any toy! Would Quincy wrestle with the boys? Would he want to sit on my lap the whole time? Would he share his snacks with the other kids? Would he be naughty? :) I am grateful for a Bishopric who didn't know this need of mine, but followed the spirit and I was placed in this calling at the perfect time!

Happy 2nd Birthday Saylor, Noah, Rafe and Quincy!!

On Quincy's due date, the 11th, I just made sure we were hanging out as a family. We went shopping in the mall (which is really fun with Oakland but not so fun with Josh and Camden. Haha) then went to Texas Road House with my parents and Brother for dinner. Spending time with loved ones on those hard days is the only thing that gets me through them. I am always tempted to stay home and watch tv all day but once I get out and moving, the days always turn out to be the best!

On October 15th, Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness day, I was having a really emotional day. I was aching for women I had met who had lost children, three just this year. I was realizing the holidays were coming and I wouldn't have Mac and Quincy there. I was kind of putting myself in a rut of pity. And then two of my best friends saved me from some simple texts that meant the world to me and reminded me that I wasn't alone...

Stacie

I have been blessed with who the Lord placed in my life in every situation I have gone through. Friends and family members who have played significant roles in getting me through the hard times with a smile on my face. I love that about our Heavenly Father. He gives us trials and hardships to overcome but he also gives us resources to help push us through. Man, am I grateful to know the separation from my boys is temporary and the fact that I am able to hug and love on Oakland and Camden every single day. To cap off a hard couple of weeks, I had a girls night out with some of the most caring, hilarious, talented, compassionate, thoughtful, crazy ladies you will ever lay eyes on!!

 

Missed those of you who couldn't make it, let's do this again soon!!!